Each time I am well prepared I have noticed since I myself know how I operate, so it is not really a downswing in itself that is the most demanding. What is most demanding is the people who don’t understand. There is a difference between not understand and to not understand and to question in order to press down the person who is in a slump. One question, of course, not a newly-operated cardiac patient about why he is not at his work or at the gym. This question not for there is a great risk that the newly-operated die if they do not take it easy. But I then ? I who live with mental ill-health called into question every time when my soul needs rest in order to not wither away and die. I questioned why I do not work and are as good as any other. Just want to explain that when I have my worst days so I am as worn and tired as a newly-operated person.

This time when I ran out of energy in total is not that I have failed in what I’m doing, but it belongs to my continuous process to take me further and develop to the stronger :

• I have written more songs than the last of my energy ran out . 11 songs on Spotify
• I’ve added one more  work area at the later time.
• I also work here at the Finest

Okay for me but I have given up my faith that it will be good in some situations. Therefore I take away my feelings in it all for they really have no where to do. It is not right to keep someone else’s perfect facade is the violation. It is not right that I who have taken me all the way here to have to endure all these abuses and dissatisfaction. Is it not time that these people start to examine themselves instead of all the time to look after the bunch of errors at me. What I’m doing. What I should have done. Point out with nice words and smiles that I am not good enough as I am.I must have a proper attraction force that some people believe that it is free to carp down on me. It goes for a while and it goes a few years. This has worked very well over a long period. Thanks and Applause to You, but now is the show end 😛 

Nothing is impossible and I am a problem solver. I think outside the box and it takes me always forward. Just give me time and everything will be good. Chatting with my most Wonderful Friend yesterday who known me for a long time. So now is the future and the question is ………. ??

Are you ready for this ?

Honesty towards oneself is something that I think is very important. I know how I want to live my life and I have plans for the future. It can be difficult for other people to let other people be. What is the right way for one person may be something that is not working at all in someone else’s life. I prioritize as I do and I give priority to different than what people who are not single make. I do not have a steady relationship since time immemorial who stand and applaud in everything that I do. I don’t have a housewife, who takes care of my home. It makes that I, as a single with my son a priority in a different way to existing our everyday life. Structure things up and get everyday life to function very well is something that I am very good at. It is so easy for those of you who live a completely different life find lots of things about my life that you don’t have a clue about how it really is. I am a warrior and I used to sit awake the whole night and figure out how I should plan the future so it will be as good as possible. Many do not know where the limits are and it is shameful that it is so difficult to let other people be. It is shameful to think that it is that you yourself do and think is so amazing that you ignore who it is that offends and what are the relationships that you destroy.

It really does not need to be the people who should understand who you are and who you have known the longest, who actually understand who you are. Want to know who you are and who loves you for who you are. But everyone I know knows who I am except a few people. But it is these few people who are trying to teach me that what one feels does not play any role. The main thing is what other people think about you and your reputation. I’d rather be hated for myself. Than loved for all the time I tried to be a person that these few people want me to be. To constantly strive to meet others ’ requirements in order to be loved and respected I don’t feel like my first priority. To violate a man through a smile while you say you want my best is the real entertainment at a high level. Distance and balance between how much you should turn off is a job all of the time and that takes much of my energy. Right now, I have not so much energy that I want. But I live in reality and understand that most of the people that I know. I understand that it can be difficult to understand everything I do and not do. But how I live my life should be up to me but I may never be left alone which results in inaction.

Just to help other people doesnt means that you own them like you own things. I am not a chattel to I receive help. Often hear that I am not good enough as I am and that what I’m doing and fighting for all the time is not good enough.

But do you know what?

You are wrong and you are not the best in the whole world and I don’t want to hang out with people like you. So stay there in your bubble so I continue to get the respect and love of the whole world instead.

I love to be creative and I’m not afraid if people think I’m weird or not like everyone else. But that is the fear all the time of people who have a large control needs. It is losing its control. They break you down and tries to mould you into someone who is easy to control. They often try to get you to be unsure when it comes to how you should be and behave when there are other people around. 

 

Have you not learned anything about life ?

Have you not learned anything about me?

Do you not know who I am?

You have no idea about most of what you want it to seem like you have. You are trapped in your bubble for it is safety and it is a choice that you have made. But I choose not to be drawn into this bubble of yours. It has long been a tug-of-war. You have lost what you thought I was, and what you deep down wanted to be I that I never was. You have lost and it was fixed. It is default when you have unreasonable demands on other people and now it has become as it has become. It’s easy to let people act how they want just because they get away by manipulating reality for themselves in order to feel good.

Haha 😛  no I was not, as some people wanted me to be and I’m so happy about this  😛 !

It’s when you take away the things that people have of you that you can finally be free and have you stopped to bother you so it is much easier 😛 

Wish you all a Great Weekend all my Lovely People  😛 

 

Many Hugs From MinikeGirl 😀